Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Anyone who would know me too well would only know that my greatest fear is solidarity. Somehow though, I do appreciate occasional lonely quiet times, like tonight, cause that's where life's realisations pour in and useful thoughts generate. I thought I'd do some deep thinking.

Mum's close friend, passed on days ago. Her daughter's constant denial towards that death is strong and true. It's heart-wrenching listening to mum relate incidents and I feel the pain so much that I began tearing at the dinner table. The blatant truth is that at some point in time, someone would take his or her leave, and I understand that perfectly. But now, more than ever, this feeling's raw, too coarse and too crude that what if, just what if, one day someone so dear to me is drained of all life? Then what?

I have much guilt to dwell upon because I have undermined the importance of so many. Friends came, changed my life for the better or for the worst, but what was I thinking when I did nothing to resist their exit? Maybe it's best I'm knowing all this now, so that nothing ever should ever ever go past me again unappreciated.


I haven't yet said this, but this is a weird time I should still be here because I have a retreat/camp/cca bonding session (whatever floats your boat) starting tmr (tue) all through till thur. But I would suggest, minus the sleepless nights and being homesick, I guess everything will still turn out dandy.

Andrew crept in during the wee hours of Monday because of a last min arrangement to stayover and I woke up to vacuum and mop the floors since my maid's faraway in her homeland for now. But we plopped back to bed again after a few episodes of boys before flowers, zonked out, then woke up again to bed wrestle (k i swear this sounds dirty so fine maybe the better word is fighting?), got changed and dined at sakae. I could live like this forever.


The other day I loaned "I love lucy" but I couldnt get hold of season one so season four would have to do for now. Flicks are best when you have someone to share the laughter and ride in the entertainment with you but I doubt anybody would have the slightest interest in I <3 lucy cept' 50 year olds so bahhhhhh.

Oh yah forgot to mention. Andrew spent the better half of the walk home trying to prove to me that my chinese really is beyond hope! I wouldn't dare say the level I am at is something that could take me on an ego trip but still.... ....

K bai I gtg now!

Hiiii kids hope you all had a fantabulous weekend. I've been working my weekend away and gotten myself sore and aching legs with a ginormous blister inclusive! Sigh but what to do GSS is here I need $$$ right. I don't already remember the last weekend I felt so terribly at peace with myself as now. Tuning in to harper's island with my legs rested high on the coffee table, not having the slightest thought about what monday's SSM has in store for me. Luv luv holidays.

I wouldn't say I've got too much time on hand though. 2 weeks with a bounty of projecks and assignments + IG camp + hangout/chill in the corner corner and poof goes the holidays! But, I am one happy trooper today! I bagged home nice shorts/undies/bag etcetera w/o having to fork a single cent.


After our pepper lunch meal the other day ange brought me to her house to play with bean and mika. We've been talking about going to her place all this time but we never got down to it. Now, little bean's become big bean and both toy poodles are all over the place now! Ange's dogs are so spoilt for choice when it comes to food, they even have these pudding like stuff that they eat with doggy fresh milk and it smells good enough to be eaten srsly.

Anyway babes dont forget our Wednesday together together.



K mangosteen juice for me now. My skin lately, has been nothing less than dehydrated. Bye.